The Midlife Toolbox from Inspire My Style
Healthy Living Midlife Tool Box

Living Your Best Life and Overcoming Adversity

(Last Updated On: September 9, 2019)

Welcome to The Midlife ToolBox, a very special series of guest posts written by Midlife Bloggers from all over the world. We are unique women, and even though we are all getting older, our perspective, challenges, and ways we see life are definitely unique! I hope you enjoy these wise words and gain some insight from them. I know I will.

This week we have the pleasure of a guest post from my Australian blogger friend, Leanne Le Cras, founder of Cresting the Hill.

When Leanne writes, I always know that her perspective will be honest, direct and intelligently thought out. She’s experienced a significant change in her life and will tell us about the midlife tools she has used, and continues to use, as her adventure through life continues.

Living your best life - overcoming adversity

Let’s hear from Leanne as she talks about living her best life:

First of all, I’d like to say thanks so much to Candi for inviting me to be part of her series on the tools we use for living our best life – this is my story and my tools.

A Little History

Lately, I’ve been in the process of recreating my life from scratch after leaving a toxic work situation that had brought me so low that I was teary at the thought of going into work each week.

I was dealing with a very disturbed workmate who over-shared every dramatic and upsetting aspect of her life. There was no way that she was going to leave her position and no way that she was going to stop pouring her drama out on me (despite repeated promises to change).

Ultimately, for my own mental and emotional health I resigned, but unfortunately, that wasn’t the end. The situation had drained me dry, and I felt quite lost and rudderless.

Living Your Best Life: It’s a Process

All that happened 4 months ago, and it’s been a process of recovery and renewal for me ever since. I’ve had to tackle it on many levels, as I work my way up from rock bottom to being in a place of acceptance and contentment – and back to joy.

To get to this point I’ve used a few tools and I’d like to share a little about each one below:

Mindfulness

Choosing my thoughts – at first my thinking revolved around all that had happened, the injustice of it, the loss, the what if’s, the could have’s and should have’s. Slowly I began to replace those negative thoughts with positive, affirmative thinking.

I reminded myself of what I’d done to try to work through things, that I hadn’t resigned on a whim, that this co-worker was too damaged for me to deal with, and that it was completely outside my role to be constantly trying to prop her up and understand her irrational behaviour.

Communication

This was a big one for me – the ability to talk it through with my husband (over, and over again) until I could reason my way through it all. To have supportive friends who listened to me, to be able to blog about it and share relevant quotes on Facebook, and to receive really helpful support from those who commented.

Many Midlife women had similar stories to tell and I found it so reassuring to know that I wasn’t alone in what had happened in this job that had seemed so perfect and had turned out to be so awful.

Wellness

I’ve used the last few months to focus on my physical health by eating healthy, walking daily, joining an exercise class, and practicing Tai Chi. I get to do these things in my own time, and I find walking outside in the fresh air and sunshine definitely improves my mood. Removing myself from the drama and stress means that the constant headaches I was dealing with have also disappeared and I don’t feel tired or flat anymore.

Mentally and emotionally I’m focusing on the positives, enjoying the flexibility and freedom of not being in a 9-5 job and not dealing with the whims of my boss. I’m feeling so much lighter and happier as I choose my thoughts and move past all that happened over the last few years.

Read more posts from the Midlife Tool Box Series

Faith

My belief that God’s in control and that He sees the big picture has also been really helpful. As I walk in the mornings, I use the time to pray and to hand things over to Him.

I’m a big believer in “God helps those who help themselves” so I’m not sitting around waiting for a miracle to arrive, but I do feel reassured and comforted to know that things are in His control and I can trust He knows the ultimate outcome.

The Future

I don’t know what the future holds at this stage. I’m not sure if I’m now officially retired or if I want to return to work, but I do know that I’ll be choosing my next moves carefully and wisely.

I’ve learned that not everything is as it initially appears to be, and that good people can have all sorts of bad stuff happening under the surface, but I also now know that I have the courage to move on and to move forward, and I am the captain of my own destiny.

I’ve survived a work nightmare and come out stronger, so who knows what’s next? Onward and upward – whether it’s in the workforce or at home, I’m confident that the future looks bright.

Leanne Le Cras, founder, Cresting the Hill

Leanne lives in the beautiful SW of Western Australia. She has two adult children who have grown and flown, married and settled in the city. Her empty nest consolation prize is two delightful grandgirls to keep her young and on her toes. Other than that, she spends way too much of her spare time blogging about the highlights of Midlife at Cresting the Hill and shares the rest of her leisure time with her husband and two cats.

Be sure to visit Leanne here:

Blog: Cresting the Hill

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Are you interested in submitting a guest post for this series? Contact me at candi@inspiremystyle.com and include your blog or website URL. We’ll have a chat! Thanks.

Candi Randolph Midlife Blogger


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25 COMMENTS

  • Thanks so much for having me as your guest Candi. I hope my story can help others who are in a transition phase – mine came unexpectedly and caused a huge jolt to my life, but in hindsight, it was the best thing that could have happened to me and I’m so pleased to be living the life I have now.

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Words of wisdom, Leanne. We don’t know why things happen to us, and when they happen it can disrupt our life and cause an upheaval. But, there is a plan, and where you’re at now is so much better! Thanks again for sharing your story. xo

  • Rena

    I love Leanne’s no-nonsense approach. I think we all go through aspects of this as we grow older. I think that we are much more open to making huge changes when we might not have been when we were younger.

    • Hi Rena – I love it when we bump into old friends on the interwebs! And yes you’re right, as we get older we start to figure out what we want to exchange parts of our life for – and a miserable workplace is certainly no longer on my list! Sometimes it takes a drastic action to give you the final push, but once the decision is made, the recovery can begin!

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Hi Rena, I agree with you. I would like to have that younger, firmer body, but wouldn’t ever want to give up the knowledge and wisdom I’ve acquired over the years. It helps us make those tough decisions.

  • Joanne Tracey

    Hey Leanne, nice to see you here. I’m loving your practical approach as you work towards whatever is next. I also love your faith. As John Lennon said, life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Hi Joanne, I have the same solid foundation of faith as Leanne, and it makes such a difference in how I look at life. It doesn’t make it easier, but I always have that solid ground to stand on. Thanks so much for stopping by.

  • Enjoy your freedom, Leanne. When bad things happen new opportunities open.

    • Thanks Rebecca – I think with the right attitude we can often turn a bad thing into something good – that’s certainly been the case with this upheaval for me.

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Hi Rebecca, life can throw things at us but our attitude and how we view things can certainly make the difference, as Leanne has shown us. Thanks for stopping by!

  • Theresa Muth

    I work so many hours at my job and the thought of relaxing and having time for exercise and for doing things I actually want to do is so tempting. Even if you do decide to go back to work, I’m sure you will have appreciated this time for self-reflection and even self improvement. I’m a bit inspired to look into Tai Chi as well. Maybe I will take a class this fall! #MSTL
    Theresa @ fabinyourfities

    • Hi Theresa – I’m so grateful that I don’t work full time – before this last job I was working 4 days a week and fitting everything else in around work. You do what you need to do for specific times of your life, but when the opportunity presents itself I think we need to be ready to take a risk and say “my time” at last. It’s certainly been a wonderful chapter for me – no matter what the future holds. And yes, definitely give Tai Chi a whirl 🙂

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Hi Theresa, thanks for stopping by, and I do hope you’ll consider a Tai Chi class, or any type of class to reduce stress and have some fun. I know what it’s like to work long hours and it can consume your life.

  • Hi Candi and lovely to see Leanne here with her thoughts and wisdom. As my closes Blogging Friend, I’ve had many conversations with Leanne about her recent changes and adjustments to leaving her job. I’ve see Leanne grow and is so much more relaxed and happy that I know she made the right decision. Thanks Leanne as always for your wonderful perspective on life and sharing your journey. xx

    • Hi Sue – you were one of my greatest supporters throughout all this and I’m so grateful for that. This group of Midlife women bloggers have been invaluable to me as cheerleaders for each new thing I’ve tried and I will be eternally grateful that I discovered this wonderful world of blogging. Who knows where we’d all be without it?

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Hi Sue, yes, Leanne has an intelligent and thoughtful perspective that always comes out in her writing, and I’m thrilled that she agreed to share with us on my site. I am so fortunate to have you all as my blogging friends! xo

  • Lovely to see Leanne here as part of your series Candi. I can very much relate to the process Leanne has been going through as I too walked away from a toxic work situation. My corporate persona was my identity so it’s been quite a process to look deep within and understand and know my real self again. I’m still in the process of redesigning my life and enjoying the process. Leanne, I have always enjoyed reading your blog because I love the way you write. It’s clear, logical, well thought out, open and honest … just how I like it. Thanks for sharing your tips with us! xo #TeamLovinLife

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Hi Min, you can certainly relate to Leanne and her challenges! I’m glad you have taken the path of walking away and rediscovering yourself. It is so much more rewarding and healthy. Thanks so much for stopping by!

    • Hi Min – isn’t it interesting how much our self image is tied to our career – and what a hit it takes when that career ends unexpectedly? I love how you’re experimenting with different ideas to see what works for you now that you’re not spending all your time in the office. I’ll probably be doing something similar down the track – dipping my toes in gradually so I don’t get too scared too quickly!

  • Debbie Harris

    Hi Candi, what a great post sharing Leanne’s words of wisdom and her very personal story. I love reading Leanne’s blog and you are right, she writes honestly, intelligently and from the heart. I can relate to so much of what she writes about. Thanks for having her on your blog as a guest in this great series. All the best and I’ve pinned for #mlstl

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Thanks so much for stopping in and sharing, Debbie. Leanne’s words have touched many readers.

    • Hi Deb – isn’t it wonderful when you discover other women who see the world in similar ways to your own? I love the blogging friendships I’ve developed over the last few years – and they’ve been such a blessing to me with the encouragement and support offered as I walked through this quagmire of change. It’s so lovely to come out the other side and to be celebrating it with my friends xx

  • Denyse Whelan

    Knowing Leanne via her blog for some time I have been aware of this major life event for her. Having her share her words and how she is managing is a great idea and writing is always a help in times of change.

    Thank you Candi for having Leanne guest post.

    Denyse #mlstl

    • Candi Randolph
      AUTHOR

      Hi Denyse, yes, writing can be therapeutic and a way of healing in our lives. I find that it brings me clarity as well when I’m muddling through a problem or idea. Thanks for stopping by!

    • Writing it all out on the blog has been a real help for me Denyse (you’d have found the same thing with writing about your cancer journey). I think putting things down in a coherent format makes dealing with it all a lot simpler and we often get insights that we’d have missed otherwise.

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